Though, worn out with grief,
I throw this body away,
what troubles me is
that a bitter name will be
set adrift upon my shade

Meaning

Though, worn out with grief, I throw this body away, what troubles me is that a bitter name will be set adrift upon my shade.

Commentary

Part Three: Ukifune

　Hearing from Ukon and Jiju the sad story of Ukon's elder sister, Ukifune came to wish for death in earnest. To go on living between the two men could only end badly for both of them; if so, she thought, there was nothing for it but that she alone should disappear. Even so, she says in this poem, the talk that would follow her death still troubles her. From here she begins quietly setting her affairs in order, burning her letters.

　Nageki wabu is to be worn past bearing by grief. "To throw the body away" is here to drown oneself. Naki kage is the spirit after death, and uki na nagasu is to have an ill name spread abroad, with nagasu, to set adrift, belonging with the river and hinting at the drowning. The movement of a mind that has settled on death and still minds what the world will say is put plainly, and the concern for one's name that all the women of the Uji chapters share is strong in it.

Author

Murasaki Shikibu

Source

Genji Monogatari

Other