This life of mine is
nothing I would grieve to lose,
and yet it has held
long enough to let me see
the white peaks of Kai, unmoved
- Meaning
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This life of mine is nothing I would grieve to lose; and yet it has lasted long enough to let me see the white peaks of Kai, indifferent as they are.
- Commentary
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Volume Ten: Down the Sea Road
A month had passed since they left the capital, and the height of spring was going by. Nothing Shigehira saw gave him any pleasure. Memories of the splendor that was, the hard days of fighting, his present wretchedness, and what lay ahead—thinking of these, his chest tightened and his heart grew heavier.
He and his wife had no children. That had been his one grief; and now, he thought, it might be counted a mercy.
Crossing Saya-no-Nakayama and Mount Utsu, he saw a snow-capped mountain far off, and asked its name: the White Peak of Kai. There he composed this poem.
Past the skirts of Fuji, over Ashigara, past Ōiso, the party came at last into Kamakura.
Kai puns on the province and on kai, worth or use. This life is not worth grieving over, and yet it has had its use—and what that use produced was the sight of the White Peak of Kai.
Tsurenaki describes something that stays unchanged regardless of what one feels. The snow-capped peak stands there indifferent alike to the splendor of the capital and to the ruin of a house. He calls that indifference tsurenaki.
He says the life was worth something, and what he saw was a cold snow mountain. In the form of a statement of gladness he states that there is no comfort. A man who says he does not value his life goes on to count up what it was worth—and finds one item.
In this chapter Shigehira composes only twice: the reply to Jijū, and this. The reply argued impermanence; this one came out of a mountain in front of him. Just before Kamakura, the journey down the sea road closes with it.
oshikaranu……not to be grieved over.
inochi naredomo……though it is my life.
kyō made ni……having lasted until today.
tsurenaki……unmoved, indifferent to one's feelings.
kai……the province of Kai, punning on worth or use.
Shirane……the White Peak of Kai.
Saya-no-Nakayama……a pass in Tōtōmi; a poetic place.
Mount Utsu……a mountain in Suruga, known from the Tales of Ise.
Dainagon-no-suke-dono……Shigehira's wife.
Ashigara……the mountain between Sagami and Suruga.
- Source
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Heike Monogatari
- Other
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