Ima wa ware izuchi yukamashi yama nite mo yo no ukikoto wa nao mo taenu ka

English Translation

Where am I to go
now, where is there left for me
When even up here
in the hills the world's hardships
still will not leave me alone

Meaning

Where am I to go now? Even up here in the hills, the hardships of the world will not leave off.

Commentary

27 Where Am I to Go

A man called Kaisen had become a priest and was living in the hills. Having no one to do his washing, he had been sending his clothes down to his parents to be laundered; and at some point his parent took offence and sent word that a man who had become a priest against the wishes of his parents and brothers should not come troubling them with such matters. Kaisen composed this poem and sent it. The prose says no more, and the section consists of this single poem.
Kaisen was a priest living in the hills. The parent's words tell us that he had taken orders over his family's objections. The twenty-eighth section records that his father held a post in the Palace Guards.
The setting is the period when he was living in the hills and sending his washing down to his parents.
What prompted the poem was the sharp message from his parent. It was sent in answer.
The section ends with the poem; the parent's response is not recorded.

The poem opens by asking where he is to go, in a hesitant grammar that makes the question one of genuine perplexity.
The third line is concessive: even here, even in the hills. Behind it stands the assumption that a man who has left the world should be beyond its reach.
What follows is the word for the world's hardships, its vexations. The closing question laments that they will not leave off even so.
A quarrel arising from something as ordinary as sending laundry home is opened out into the complaint of a man who cannot get clear of the world. He does not direct his grievance at the parent; he states it as having nowhere left to go.

Source

Yamato Monogatari

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