Kazu naranu mi nomi monouku omōete mataruru made mo narinikeru kana - Gosen Wakashu(English Translation & Meaning)

数ならぬ身のみもの憂く思ほえて
待たるるまでもなりにけるかな

Roma-ji: Kazu naranu mi nomi monouku omōete mataruru made mo narinikeru kana
English Translation: Feeling only that
I, who count for nothing, was
the one to grieve,
I have come so far as this—
to be someone waited for
Meaning: Feeling only that I, who count for nothing, was the one to be miserable, I stayed away—and now have become someone waited for.
Commentary: Book Eighteen Miscellaneous Poems IV 1260

Headnote: "Reply."
The son-in-law says that feeling only his own worthlessness and gloom, he has come to be someone waited for. Hearing that another was sending letters, he had held back thinking himself of no account, and he answers that he never imagined he was being awaited.
It is the son-in-law's reply to the mother's preceding poem, taking up "matsu ni," in waiting, with "mataruru," to be waited for.
The poet is given as "the son-in-law," the daughter's husband mentioned in the preceding headnote, and his name is not known.

The first line, "Kazu naranu," means "one who counts for nothing," humbling himself beside the one who sent letters.
The second line, "mi nomi monouku," means "only I, gloomy."
The third line, "omōete," means "so it seemed to me."
The fourth line, "mataruru made mo," means "to the point of being waited for," with "ruru" passive. It takes up "matsu ni" in the fourth line of the preceding poem.
The last line, "narinikeru kana," means "have I come to be," with "kana" exclamatory.
Source: Gosen Wakashu
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