Koisomeshi kokoro no iro no nani nareba omoikaesu ni kaerazaruran - Senzai Wakashu(English Translation & Meaning)

恋ひそめし心の色の何なれば
思ひ返すに返らざるらん

Roma-ji: Koisomeshi kokoro no iro no nani nareba omoikaesu ni kaerazaruran
English Translation: Begun to love, dyed,
the color of the heart, what
can it be, that when
I try to turn it back again,
it will not return
Meaning: The color of a heart that has begun to love, what dye can it be, that however I try to turn it back, it will not return?
Commentary: Book Fourteen Love Poems IV 892

Headnote: "Composed as a love poem"
This poem was composed as a love poem. The color of a heart that began to love, what can it be, she says, that it will not return however I try to turn it back? Likening a heart "dyed" with love to the color of dyed cloth, she conveys a hopeless love, saying that just as a color will not come back when one tries to re-dye the cloth, the heart will not return to what it was before love however one tries to think again. It is a crafted poem layering words of dyeing, "dye," "color" and "turn back."
The author, "Kojijū of the Grand Empress Dowager's household," was the daughter of Ki no Mitsukiyo, Superintendent of Iwashimizu Hachimangū. She served Grand Empress Dowager Fujiwara no Masaruko and others, and from a poem of hers on the evening of waiting she was called "Matsuyoi no Kojijū," "Kojijū of the Waiting Evening."

First line, "koisomeshi": "some" pivots between "begin" to love and "dye" a color. "Shi" is the attributive of the past "ki."
Second line, "kokoro no iro no": "kokoro no iro," "the color of the heart," likens the heart's state to the color of a dye and is an associated word for "dye" in the first line.
Third line, "nani nareba": "for what reason, what color can it be," answering "ran" in the last line.
Fourth line, "omoikaesu ni": "even trying to think again," with "kaesu" overlaid with re-dyeing a color, an associated word for "dye" and "color." "Ni" is adversative.
Fifth line, "kaerazaruran": "zaru" is the negative auxiliary and "ran" an auxiliary conjecturing a present cause, "why will it not return." It closes by repeating the verb of "kaesu" in the fourth line.
Author: Kojiju
Source: Senzai Wakashu
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