Uchiharau tomo naki koro no nezame ni wa tsugaishi oshi zo yowa ni koishiki - Murasaki Shikibu Nikki(English Translation & Meaning)

うちはらふ友なきころの寝覚めには
つがひし鴛鴦ぞ夜半に恋しき

Roma-ji: Uchiharau tomo naki koro no nezame ni wa tsugaishi oshi zo yowa ni koishiki
English Translation: With no friend these days
to brush the frost from my feathers,
when I wake at night
it is my mated mandarin duck
I long for in the dark
Meaning: These days I have no friend to brush the frost from my wings, and when I wake in the night, it is you, my companion who nestled beside me like a mandarin duck, whom I miss.
Commentary: 24 Sorrow at Home and the Exchange with Lady Dainagon

In the eleventh month of Kankō 5 (1008), as Empress Shōshi's return to the palace drew near, the copying of The Tale of Genji into bound volumes was under way at the Tsuchimikado mansion. Watching the waterbirds multiply on the pond day by day, Murasaki had hoped for snow before the return. But she had gone home for a short while, and two days later the snow fell. The unremarkable trees of her family home brought her no cheer; friends with whom she had once shared tales had drifted away, and she was made to feel how deeply court service had changed her. Amid all this she found herself longing for Lady Dainagon, who had lain beside her near the Empress night after night, talking with her.
Lady Dainagon was Minamoto no Renshi, daughter of Minamoto no Sukenori and a niece of Michinaga's principal wife, Minamoto no Rinshi. She served Empress Shōshi as a lady of high rank and was close to Murasaki.
When Murasaki's poem "Ukine seshi mizu no ue nomi koishikute kamo no uwage ni sae zo otoranu" arrived, Lady Dainagon sent back this reply.
Seeing that not only the poem but even its brushwork was exquisite, Murasaki admired her as a lady without flaw in anything. After this exchange, at the wish of the Empress and Rinshi, Murasaki returned to court and attended the Empress on her return to the palace on the seventeenth day of the eleventh month.

The opening lines speak of these days without a friend to brush away the frost, answering Murasaki's "wild duck's feathers" with the image of companions who shake the frost from each other's wings. The third line, "when I wake at night," answers her "slept afloat."
The lower verses confess that in the night she longs for the mandarin duck that was her mate, that is, Murasaki who slept beside her, sealed by an emphatic construction. Mandarin ducks symbolized devoted companionship; setting them against Murasaki's wild duck and returning her "I miss" with her own "I long for," Lady Dainagon replies that she feels the same. Sharing the imagery of waterbirds, the two confirm each other's loneliness in an exchange of true understanding.
Author: Lady Dainagon
Source: Murasaki Shikibu Nikki
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