数ならぬ心のとがになしはてじ
知らせてこそは身をも恨みめ
知らせてこそは身をも恨みめ
- Roma-ji
-
Kazu naranu kokoro no toga ni nashihateji shirasete koso wa mi o mo uramime
- English Translation
-
Of no account, I
will not put it all down as
my own heart's fault,
only after I've told you
will I resent this my lot.
- Meaning
- I will not dismiss it all as the fault of my own worthless heart; only after I have let you know my feelings will I resent my lot.
- Commentary
-
Love Poems 653
Headnote: "Love"
In the text the headnote reads simply 'Love,' and from this poem to 711 at the end of the book there follows a series of love poems with no particular topic; this is the first. The poet will not simply dismiss his hopeless love as the fault of his own unworthy heart. Only after confessing his feelings and making them known, and finding them still unanswered, will he resent his own lot. The poem shows a resolve to step beyond a hidden love.
It was included in the second book of love poems of the Shinkokinshū.
First line, “kazu naranu”: not counted, of no account, the poet's lowly self.
Second line, “kokoro no toga ni”: toga is a fault, a sin.
Third line, “nashihateji”: nashihatsu is to settle it entirely as so, and ji is negative intention: I will not. The poem breaks after the third line.
Fourth line, “shirasete koso wa”: only after letting her know; the binding particle koso is answered by the perfective me at the end.
Fifth line, “mi o mo uramime”: me is the perfective of the auxiliary of intention mu: then I will resent my lot.
- Author
- Saigyō
- Source
- Sankashu
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Uchimukau sono aramashi no omokage o makoto ni nashite miru yoshi mo gana