よそながらあはれと言はむことよりも
人づてならで厭へとぞ思ふ
人づてならで厭へとぞ思ふ
- Roma-ji
-
Yoso nagara aware to iwamu koto yori mo hitozute narade itoe to zo omou
- English Translation
-
Rather than you say
"how sad," while keeping always
far away from me,
I would wish you'd spurn me
not through others, but yourself
- Meaning
- Rather than have you pity me from afar, I would sooner you rejected me yourself, not through someone else.
- Commentary
-
Book Seven Love Poems I 196
The poet would rather be rejected by the beloved face to face than receive words of sympathy from afar. The poem reveals a twisted love that finds a direct refusal closer than distant pity.
The first line, "yoso nagara" (while far away), marks the distance from the beloved. The next poem, 197, takes up "yoso no hito" and "aware to iwazu," shifting the point of view with the same words.
The second line, "aware to iwamu," uses the conjectural "mu" for words of pity she might offer.
The third line, "koto yori mo" (rather than that), sets up a comparison with "yori."
The fourth line, "hitozute narade," uses the negative "de" to mean not through another person.
The final line, "itoe to zo omou," adds the emphatic "zo" to the imperative "itoe" (spurn me), closing with a strong wish to be rejected outright.
- Source
- Shika Wakashu
- Prev Poem
-
Inochi araba au yo mo aramu yo no naka ni nado shinu bakari omou kokoro zo
- Next Poem
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Koishinaba kimi wa aware to iwazu tomo nakanaka yoso no hito ya shinobamu