Ikade ka wa maki no itado mo sashinagara tsuraki kokoro no ari nashi o min - Izumi Shikibu Nikki(English Translation & Meaning)

いかてかは槇の板戶もさし乍ら
つらき心のありなしをみん

Roma-ji: Ikade ka wa maki no itado mo sashinagara tsuraki kokoro no ari nashi o min
English Translation: How could you ever,
with the cypress door still shut
and barred against you,
hope to see whether my heart
were truly cold or not?
Meaning: How could you tell whether my heart is cruel or not, while the cypress door stayed shut between us?
Commentary: 8 The Cypress Door Left Shut

After exchanging poems with Izumi Shikibu on her return from the pilgrimage, the prince came to her secretly as before. She had thought he would hardly come and, tired from her recent journey, had dozed off, so no one heard the knocking at the gate. The prince, who had heard certain rumors, wondered whether some other man was there and quietly left.
The woman is Izumi Shikibu, daughter of Ōe no Masamune and, as the wife of Tachibana no Michisada, Governor of Izumi, mother of Koshikibu no Naishi. The Prince of the Dazaifu is Prince Atsumichi, fourth son of Emperor Reizei, so called because he served as Governor-General of the Dazaifu. The Palace Minister whose disapproval he feared was Fujiwara no Kinsue, and the Crown Prince was Atsumichi's elder brother by the same mother, Prince Okisada.
The next morning the prince's "Akezarishi maki no toguchi ni tachinagara tsuraki kokoro no tameshi to zo mishi" arrived, and realizing that he had come the night before, Izumi Shikibu regretted having fallen thoughtlessly asleep and sent back this poem.
After the poem she added, "You seem to be guessing at my heart; if only I could show it to you." The prince wished to visit again that night, but his people warned him against it, and he held back for fear that the Palace Minister and the Crown Prince would think him frivolous, so his visits became very rare.

The first line, "how could you," is rhetorical. The second and third lines mean "with the cypress door shut," taking up his "cypress door."
The lower verses mean "how could you see whether there is a cruel heart or not?" echoing his "example of a cruel heart" and turning it back on him. Since he left without the door ever being opened, he could not possibly have seen her heart; so she gently corrects his mistaken suspicion of another man.
Author: Izumi Shikibu
Source: Izumi Shikibu Nikki
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