Matsuramu to omowaba ika ni isogamashi ato o mi ni dani madou kokoro o - Senzai Wakashu(English Translation & Meaning)

待つらむと思はばいかに急がまし
跡を見にだにまどふ心を

Roma-ji: Matsuramu to omowaba ika ni isogamashi ato o mi ni dani madou kokoro o
English Translation: If I could but think
that you were waiting, how I'd hurry
all the more,
when even now, to see what's left,
my heart is lost in turmoil
Meaning: If I could think you were waiting for me, how much more I would hurry, when even now, going only to see what you have left behind, my heart is in turmoil.
Commentary: Book Nine Poems of Lament 599

Headnote: "Composed as I hurried down, having heard that my father, who had gone down to Suō Province, had died there"
Composed as the poet hurried down to Suō Province on hearing that his father, who had gone there, had died. If I could think he was waiting, how I would hurry, he says, when even going to see what he left behind my heart is in turmoil. Even on a journey where no one waits, his heart is troubled and he hurries; had his father been alive and waiting, how much more he would have hastened, and through this impossible supposition he conveys the grief of losing his father.
The author, "Fujiwara no Chikamori," was an official and poet of the late Heian period, but little is known of his life.
Poem 568 of this book sings of hurrying up from the provinces to a wife who died in the capital, a homeward road with no one waiting, "tare ka wa ima wa ware o matsuran." This poem, conversely, hurries down from the capital to a father who died in the provinces, so the two form a pair of journeys up and down.

First line, "matsuramu to": the present conjectural "ramu," "that my father is waiting." It corresponds to "ware o matsuran" in the last line of 568 of this book.
Second line, "omowaba": "omowa" is the irrealis, and with "ba" forms a hypothetical, "if I could think so."
Third line, "ika ni isogamashi": the counterfactual "mashi," "how I would hurry." The poem pauses here.
Fourth line, "ato o mi ni dani": "ato" is what the dead leave behind. "Dani" means "even," "even going only to see what he left."
Fifth line, "madou kokoro o": "madou" is to be in turmoil, and "o" an adversative tinged with feeling, "though my heart is so troubled," leaving a lingering mood.
Author: Fujiwara no Chikamori
Source: Senzai Wakashu
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